random – Page 2 – Bureau of Betterment

Monster Portraits

I’ve been thinking about monsters lately, so I decided to get them out of my brain by making some monster portraits of my new compatriots over at Jelly Helm Studio. I admit, I wasn’t sure how these would be received. When a child draws garish representations of their family members a mother can’t do anything but reply “Oh, honey, these are wonderful!” But when a grown woman likens her workmates to monsters, well…

Luckily the response from Jelly, Mark and NJ was delight and guttural exclamations (also of delight, I assume), after which we hung the family of frames outside the studio door. Why yes, we have a security system on premises: four fake monsters.

After debuting the quartet I asked their human counterparts for a first impression interview which are transcribed below, and are 90% accurate to what was recorded on my iPhone during the interviews.

Ten Second Interview with NJ the Intern
Bureau Representative: What were you thinking at the moment this portrait was taken?
NJ the Intern: Erm. Hmmm. Ugghghhh. Tphhht.
Bureau Representative: Unsure?
**NJ reaches out and softly strokes his fuzzy tan fur**
Bureau Representative: How does it feel to touch yourself?
NJ the Intern: Um. Uhhh. Uggg. Feels good.
Bureau Representative: What sound is your little mouth making in this portrait?
NJ the Intern: Glerm.
Continue reading “Monster Portraits” →

Things Are Afoot, Wieners Too

I don’t often blog about things before they happen. I prefer to let things run their course, gather my thoughts, and then let it all out. But recently I made an agreement with one Jelly Helm to work together for a bit and see how it goes. Kind of like a reallly long date; one with a full 3-course meal and several desserts. I hope one of them is strawberry shortcake.

I am writing about it now because it is exciting! Also, this is a longer engagement than usual for me, and I will probably be blogging the intermittent results along the way. I’ve been freelancing for year and a half now, and for the most part it agrees with me. But part of what I miss is the collaboration you get from being part of a group. While I am happy drawing pioneer rabbit adventures, I also like to have my brain poked from the outside.

As for the Bureau of Betterment, I will still be accepting other projects, but for a while I will have to be a bit choosier because of my time commitment to this new endeavor. Does that super cool gig come with a YEAR’S SUPPLY OF PICKLED HERRING? Let’s talk.

Outfit No. 46

Outfit No. 46: "L" is for lederhosen, which I did not wear, but was definitely the most interesting outfit at the party I attended. I did dance with the lederhosen-wearer, which is enough for his outfit to trump mine. / A felt hat with appropriately rustic woven twine band. / Red & white checkered shirt. / Leather knee-length lederhosen. / Some tall woolen socks. / Brown suede shoes.

A mule by another name…

I received three figurines in the mail from my friend Sarah, who wrote that she knew I liked horses and thought I might do something fun with these half-inch tall toys. I opened the tissue paper wrapping she sent them in to find two horses…and a baby calf?

I was pretty sure that Sarah knew the difference between a calf and a foal…but what WAS the relationship of my three new charges, and did THEY know that something was off kilter? I have a feeling an uncomfortable confrontation between the baby calf and the Parental Horse Units will be happening soon.

Two parental horses decide when to tell their baby calf that things aren't as they seem. — Son, there is something we need to tell you...

Add to your ‘Most Ridiculous Riders Ever’ List

After reading an article on The Smoking Gun about the Foo Fighters’ rider, my pioneer rabbit started to get real persnickety leading up to his participation in the Stumptown 40 Pinewood Derby Car Race. So he hired a crack legal team to craft a ridiculous rider. Probably never should have taken those glossy head shots. Rabbit knows what rabbit wants, I guess.

pioneer-rabbit-rider-preview — Who knew a fake pet rabbit could be so demanding...

Add to your 'Most Ridiculous Riders Ever' List

Me and My Pioneer Rabbit, Derby Car Racers

After much deliberation, it was decided that my rabbit would be the driver. After all, the pinewood derby car was bit small for me. So we set about making the fastest racing machine we could, and no expense was spared: custom rims, jaunty racing scarf, glossy enamel paint job. VROOM VROOM.

Pioneer Rabbit Racer

A month or so ago my friend Melissa told me she was entering a pinewood derby car race with AIGA. It sounded like a lot of fun, so I signed up too. Organized by Dave Selden and Ryan Parr, the event is called Stumptown 40 and is the creative person’s chance for glory in the cub scout arena. Selecting my driver for the race was a no brainer: my pioneer rabbit…seen here posing next to his custom rims in his first glossy headshot promo.

I don't know how he signs his pictures without thumbs...

Conan O’ Brien As Seen By John Kascht

Two of my favorite things to watch on the television, together at last! Caricature artist John Kascht gives an insightful and in-depth glimpse into his process, both in understanding his subject and drawing it, while working on portraits of one of my favorite TV funny men: Conan O’Brien. JUST WATCH IT!!!